Etel Adnan

Issue 41
Spring 2018

 

 Etel Adnan

while whales keep swimming north

for Vincent Katz

Revelation is continuous.
Incredible

what am I searching for?

Last summer an august moon
acted on an irrigated field
the water soon disappeared

whales kept swimming north

California fires are
spreading
making infernos jealous

highways tumbling over
each other

breaking narratives apart

The world is turning
within its dizziness

a woman is lying under
her woolen covers

smashing her dreams
with her wrists
murder is in the air

Olson’s letter to the F.B.I.
was returned

America failed that
day

got stranded

We are so powerless
dreaming pitiful dreams

heads bent on the zinc

fever at the door

railway stations are closing
their travelers have died

The horizon is stuffed with
low plains

a foghorn is tooting

the President is tweeting

the subways leaking
gasoline

will two and two make four for ever?

Money is piling up
as fast as money does

and big clouds are deserting
their territories

the fires are spreading

danger points
at every corner

confusion is welcome

like bread for the hungry

an alarm clock gets to be
useless in an airport

the damage is everywhere
black holes are waiting
for the too many that are being
born

the fires are expanding . . .

Pretty soon our bones
will be stacked in
museums

open the window and
watch the sunset feast
on red fish

don’t call for help
angels are on vacation

subliminal messages
are crowding the land

My spirit can descend
the stairway

everything is utterly possible.

II

Strange languages engage
the air

Ulysses has just landed

his coat is torn
the voyage was filled
with thorns
California is still burning
with primeval fires

and Ulysses is sitting
on scorched earth

in this winter
the ocean is boiling with
anger
I mean in the northern
hemisphere
A promenade on the beach
quiets one’s insanity

but it’s always “for a while”

the billboards have erased all
directions

and delayed the agony
of waiting at bus stops

for the end of the day

Champagne is flowing
in parties and bars

away from the hills
—and homes—going
up in flames

the thirst has many needs

desires are bubbling
as ephemeral
as the morning dew

or a jazz note

California is burning

we steadily hear voices
over the radio . . .

are one’s belongings
one’s life?

Cars have their own
artificial intelligence:

they take us to foreign
planets

where rivers intersect with
the mind that splits and
drives on.

III

The moon is ablaze at
its edges

swollen

over California highways

where the land is burning

the fire is equally reaching
my brain

where acres of
thoughts

are up in flames

it’s scintillating

in there

lights in the midst of
massive sheets of smoke

what’s gone does matter . . .

beds and memories
now companions
in absence

what is fire?

A voracious spirit
probably

a being’s anger made
manifest

an angel sowing panic

a cosmic love-affair went
wrong

in an ultimate pit

The brain given to me
is burning

along the roads of
California

California being my second
origin

Its mountains raised my
spirit

I became one with the sap
of its trees

nature is at war with
itself

in a language still
un-decoded

somehow all there is
is not of this world

IV

don’t light your cigarette
don’t play with fire

then what’s left to do?

In the depth of the country
where cemeteries lie
next to people alive

silence rules

at night fear takes over

bedsheets remain cold
even in summer’s heat

and over beer
people enjoy a talk on the war

it doesn’t matter if the catastrophe
happened now or if they got it
through textbooks

there’s hatred in the air

Fires are entering their reality
smells of burned horses

the levelling down of
city quarters

and chaparral feeding
more fires

but the fires didn’t make their way
into statistics yet

TV gives them the status of national
events

in your gut you know
you have rediscovered
your ability to cry

but we have brought so much violence
to the world

(always ‘over there’)

that understanding bypassed us

chunks of the country are disappearing
leaving us naked to the bone

finding solidarity
such as with a boat lost in high seas
recovered by Melville

the forests are going up
in ecstatic flames

There’s no harm in staying home
and keeping the storm outside
if you can

fires have a way to clean up
landscapes as well as
guilts

they’re thoroughly
innocent

we watch them
we do

and those who die in them
redeem us.